For the first time after has
been living alone for more than 3 years in Yogyakarta, I feel so difficult to
leave my hometown, South Tangerang. It is too easy for me to get homesick when
I am in Yogyakarta. I miss my father, my brothers, and also my close family
in South Tangerang.
I guess it happened because I
didn’t get enough support here. Well, for the truth, I still need support to go
through the tragedy of my mom’s passed away. It makes me down to the lowermost
level moreover I am on progress to finish my thesis.
In South Tangerang, when I miss
my mom, I used to go to my close family houses or visit to her resting place. Seriously,
I feel better when I meet with her brothers and sisters (my uncles and aunts).
I don’t know why this happen, but I think it caused they are the closest people
with my mom, after my father and my brothers. So, they can be a representative
of my mom. They also frequently tell me about her goodness and I am delighted
to hear that.
In addition, I commonly visit
her cemetery once in two weeks. Surely, it has a big impact for me. After
visiting her cemetery, my miss is reduced. Besides, the Messenger of
Allah (pbuh) said we have to frequently visit a sacred place in order to make
us remember about our die. Therefore, I am pleased to go to her resting place.
For those reasons, I feel
better to live in South Tangerang than Yogyakarta for this moment. But then,
the strongest reason why I feel more comfort to live in South Tangerang is my
father and my brother, especially my youngest brother (Fahri-7 years old).
There is no hesitates to say that I’m really happy when I through my life time
with him. He is the last “present” from my mom.
 |
| Sumber: dokumentasi pribadi |
When I interact with him, I get
some pleasure. I enjoy when I teach him to do his homework. I’m happy when I
teach him read Koran. I’m happy when we pray together at the mosque. I’m happy
when we play soccer in the afternoon. And also I’m happy when I bike him to his
TPA (a place to learn Koran).
Interact many times with him
makes me enjoy, though sometimes also annoyed because he asked me for many
things. But overall, his attitude often makes my miss of mom healed. Formerly,
my mom put so much love to him. He often gets special treat from her. It caused
he is the youngest among us. Nevertheless I didn’t feel any envy at all to him.
The truth is I feel so sorry for him.
I think Fahri is the unluckiest
son among us (me and my 2 young brothers). Why? Well, he just turned into 7 and
lost the main source of affection in that age. I think everyone agree that
mother is the best people to take care of her child. Until the end of the
world, there is no father has an ability to take care of his child as good as
mother. Therefore, Fahri may be lack of affection.
I wonder the lack of affection
impacting his future. What if he has a psychological problem? Indeed, there is
no sign about it till now and I hope the sign never come to him. In
consequence, I want to do my best to take care of him in order to prevent it.
When I was going home from
Yogyakarta for the first time after my mom’s passed away, I looked he seriously
careless. He looked thin sadly. After few days at home, I know it caused by the
lack of nutrition. His mainly dishes was only either fried egg or noodle. Although
he was still fun and enjoy with that, but I have a duty to be more responsible
to him. Therefore, I feed him with more nutritiously food.
His appearance was also not
good. He has long and dirty fingernail. His skin also looked dusty. In general,
his appearance made me so sad. I was so sad because I knew it would never
happen when my mom still alive. My father can’t take care of him at all times
because he should work. The person who most care to Fahri is my neighbor whom
also the closest friend of my mom.
She had a heart of gold. She
always pays her attention to us (my family) and often cooks for Fahri and gives
him special attention. I hope Allah bless her and give her a healthy and long
life, happiness, also good ending.
#room corner, Pakdhe's dorm
0 comments:
Post a Comment